Do you have a drop it cue?

Not your dog, you…

Can you drop your expectations?

Can you drop your frustration?

Can you drop your anger?

Can you drop your schedule and improvise when something doesn’t go according to plan?

I know that you can. That you can be a champion at “drop it”.

What if you could drop the idea of what life with your dog is supposed to be like and take life as it comes? No expectation, no disappointment, no frustration.

Practically speaking 

Right Kajsa, so should I just bundle all of my expectations together and shout: Heave! Overboard with them! Into the deepest abyss of the ocean they go… And then get on with life?

Mweahhhh me thinks not.

I agree. It’s not that simple. You need a strategy. Getting rid of expectations completely is like trying not to think of anything. It doesn’t work, unless you’re dead, or not human.

What triggers you?

What you can do is become aware of what triggers you. You probably know what’s on the list of your dog’s triggers. Time to figure out what’s yours.

• Dog gobbled up an abandoned sandwich and didn’t “drop it”? Sigh…
• As if dogs weren’t enough, now he’s started barking at people? Despair…
• Got up at 5am because you figured you would be alone and you met not one, but two other dogs? Why the heck did you even bother to get up? Grmbl…
• Typing up a piece for work and the UPS, FEDEX, DHL and garbage truck all came by within 30 minutes of each other, so bye bye focus time. Aaargghhhh…

Why did you get fired up? That will give you an idea of what your expectations were.

• People shouldn’t just dump their half eaten crap out in nature like that. And yet they did… What if you dropped the expectation of living in an ideal world and took it the way it was? Some people just dump shit, now what?

• If I get up at 5am I have the right to be all alone on my walk. Meeting other dogs at that time is not how it’s supposed to be. Says who? Do you hold the patent on early morning walks? That’s the expectation to drop.

• I just wanted to get some stuff done for work, not to have to get up to calm my dog every 5 minutes. This is so annoying… What if you managed your expectation of what it’s like to work with your dog being home? Could you plan for interruptions?  Schedule a block of time in your calendar as a back-up for if you’ve been interrupted too often? 

The more conscious you are, not just of your dog’s triggers but of your own triggers, the more you’ll realize what your unconscious expectations are, the more you’ll be able to drop them.

The more you practice dropping expectations in different situations, the more you will be able to generalize the behavior. Behavior modifications protocols work for humans too.